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New Model

 Model Year: 2010
Product Name: Michael DuPuy

Hello, and welcome to the Greatest Product Show EVER! In this segment, we're going to be interviewing the makers of the upcoming 2011 Edition of:

Michael DuPuy

We'll ask him/her a couple of questions about the 2010 product and later discuss why you should upgrade to the 2011 Edition!

First question:
What makes the 2010 version different from the last versions?

-Firstly there have been a number of improvements between 2009 and 2010. We have discontinued our support for largescale use of the Alchohol app suite. It never showed any real benefit and held up virtually every other program we had. We debuted the Caddy mobile docking peripheral which has done quite well despite several bugs in the system. Also we made great progress in our series of writing apps, particularly with the interaction with the NaNoWriMo social networking site.-

Great! Now, are there any ideas that you expanded on from the 2009 model that you decided to keep in 2010?

-Yes. The Felicia all purpose peripheral has proven to be invaluable and we shall continue our support for that platform.

How about anything new that you decided to add? What makes those things useful?

-We've been regularly updating the blog apps as well as completing our first 50k benchmark in the NaNoWriMo app. These are both tools that will allow us to lay the framework that is needed to upgrade from fledgeling writer to the far superior Amateur Author OS.

For all of the people that are still using 2009 and older, what do you think they should know about the new 2010 edition in terms of upgrading?

-Quite frankly I don't know anyone who really uses any model prior to 2009. There's just been so many fundamental improvements to the basics of the system. There's far more compatibility with other platforms, the search engines have been greatly improved, and we've had a far better sense of direction this past year that we look to improve on in 2011.

Thank you for that lovely information!


I'm now about to ask you a short series of questions about the upcoming 2011 edition!
1st question:

What is currently repaired from the 2010 version? What did you do to fix it?

-We have repaired the Alcohol app suite so that we won't experience any overloads for the forseeable future. Most of our work though has been put into planning for 2011.

Do you think that you will decide to get rid of anything that was useful in the 2010 edition?

-The only thing that comes to mind is the Caddy mobile docking port. We don't currently have the funding to provide an alternative but if we get the opportunity to do so then we shall. The same goes for the Parents House Home Station.

I've heard a lot of companies were giving their 2011 products Boyfriend/Girlfriend utilities. Will the new 2011 edition of your product have a Boyfriend/Girlfriend?

-It'd really not a priority as of now. We're open to the possibility but we need to focus on certain OS upgrades as well as hardware maintenance.

What new add-on(s) are you going to add into the 2011 edition?

-The add-on we're really looking to get up and running at the moment would be the Job Power Adapter.

Thank you so much! Please enjoy this time-line while we take a commercial break!


The CSF OS debuts with high prospects.


CSF OS 1.2 debuts
Discontinuance of the Zoloft anti-virus software.
Alchohol app suite debuts
Tobacco app suite debuts
CSF OS 1.3 debuts
Hand Chair Docking Station Debuts
CSF OS officialy abandoned
KD OS announced


Tuxedo Junction Job power supply debuts
KD OS debuts
Tuxedo Junction Job Power Supply crashes
CSS Job Power Supply debuts
CSS Job Power Supply crashes


KD OS is discontinued.
KD OS Wallpaper debuts.
Greendale Entertainment Center Debuts
Wal Mart Job Power Supply debuts


Wal Mart Job Power Supply crashes.
NaNoWriMo app reaches 50k for the first time.

Writing apps 'Write1Sub1' and '365kin365days' have been added and the 'NaNoWriMo' app shall be returning.

A new maintenance program called 'Walking' has been added.

Also the discontinuance of 'Nicotine' has been anounced.

The Wake Up Job

The last few days have been bittersweet. I have known joy only to have it followed by utter defeat. I have managed to get a job and start a job only to have it come crashing down around me as I realize I’m not cut out for it. My beliefs and thoughts on the state of my health have burned to ground with me inside them to baffled to scream for help. Then I knew a deathly quiet as I lay in the remnants of my lovely little world and see the things which still stand. I see these things and I see what I must do. I rise from the ashes with hope and a plan.

I told you all that I had gotten a job. This is true. I went there the first day and began washing dishes at Nieman Marcus Café for eight dollars an hour. I originally believed that it would be a hard job but one that I would acclimate to given time. After all I had been reluctant to move to do anything for almost seven months at that point. After the first day of working for seven hours straight without a break I was utterly run down. I’m not upset about not getting a break and although I did not get a lunch break I along with everyone else had the option to partake in the family meal which consisted of free food cooked right there. The reason that not having the breaks was ok is because you could see quite plainly that no one was getting a break and that was simply because there was no time to get one.

Every time I turned around after taking a moment exhale there were at least twice as many dishes as I had just scrambled to take care of. Also the chefs were almost perpetually in need of sautee pans despite my best efforts and the other dishwashers there with me. But I made it through that first day and survived albeit only by the very strictest sense of the term in that I was breathing. Every single molecule of my body cried out in pain and muscles I didn’t even know I had were cramping with fierce regularity. Even then I was still up for another day of even if it was to start at seven thirty in the morning with just enough time for me to sleep and then get back. Even if I had to endure a commute that was even worse than the physical punishment exacted upon me.

That’s when I got to day two. This day was to be even longer and even busier than the first. Then I learn that one of the two other dish washers there had called in sick. I was still getting cramps in my sore muscles from the day before and now I was to have to do even more. I gave it my all. Never say I didn’t. I worked as fast and as hard and as smart as I could. But to no avail. I was still falling woefully behind and as the day wore on I began to perform worse than I did the day before. The other dish washer repeatedly came over to help me and eventually he was practically doing both of our jobs. I could not see any slowing in my actual pace but that is likely due to the fact that I was simply not letting my self stop out pure pigheaded refusal to give up.

It wasn’t until after the chef who had hired me had joined us in washing dishes simply in order to keep the restaurant in business, that I got any respite. She told me to go sit down for a breather after she had noticed me several times emitting audible gasps of pain due to the now ever present cramps. After some time (I have no idea how much. I wasn’t exactly paying attention to things that didn’t solve my pain) she came over to me and sat down to talk with me. After I had had time to eventually find a position that didn’t keep cramping my muscles to no end, I had to stop and think. I had to come to terms with the fact that my health is not where I thought it was. Oh I knew I was unhealthy no doubt about that but I didn’t think it was this bad. I had to admit that I could not in my present condition continue in this job. I wanted to believe it or not. But I couldn’t.

So I thanked her for giving me the opportunity to work there and be a part of their family. And they are a family. None of that corporate drivel saying that everyone is part of the family and helps each other out. No the bond there is one that can only be achieved by having to work so closely and so quickly together as one doesn’t really matter what management tells you there will be a bond of some sort. Then I left. Everyone says that I left in a single piece but I don’t believe it. I then dealt with nightmarish traffic that felt like a punishment for giving up.

It was during this hellish drive that I took stock of my health and career. After much consideration I have decided that I shall start to exercise regularly. Starting with a walk every day and I shall mention my progress in my blogs in order to help me stay focused and continue my walks as well as get encouragement from others and provide encouragement to others going through the same thing.

I also took stock of my writing career which has earned me to date: fifty seven cents. This is from a single click on a google ad sense ad. I have decided that NaNoWriMo is too contained to be able to get me to writing properly all year round so I have decided to undertake not one but two different year long challenges for the year of 2011. The first is Write1Sub1. The goal is to write one short story and submit one short story every week of the year. The rules are that you write a new story every week and then that you submit a story every week to some outfit that actually takes writing seriously.

The other challenge I have taken on is one that a NaNo friend of mine cooked up and challenged me to after I mentioned that NaNo was simply not crazy enough for my taste. The goal here is to write 365k in 365 days. If you want to take a day off you have to get ahead. Rewrites do not count towards this goal and although you can have as many different stories as you want they have to be new and you can’t use blog posts or world building for the count either. These are all rules of which I approve. I can’t wait to let the insanity begin. 

The Moment I've Really Been Waiting For

 Alright guys. I do believe I may have made it. All I have to do is show back up in DFW and pass a background check and a drug test and I’ve got a job. It’s nice to have gone through my life with nothing but traffic tickets on my record because I can breath a lot easier now. It may not be the best job but it’s one that I can do and more importantly get paid for.

Did you hear that sis? It looks like I’ll be paying you back for all those Chinese food and Whataburger runs pretty soon. Also I’ll finally be able to save up for a car and possibly if I’m making enough I just might be able to move out on my own or with a room mate. I’m looking up but now I’m finding the footholds to take me out of here.

I’ll see if I can’t get an update of My Life as it Should Have Been up sometime tomorrow.

Later Days.

Major Anouncement and Major Pains

 There is a momentous occasion soon to be had. It shant be long before Hurst Tx my hometown shall be receiving something legendary. I have been longing for this day ever since that one trip to California so long ago now. I may rest though now. For soon there shall be right down the street from me an In-N-Out Burger. Check it out.


I fell in love with In-N-Out Burger from the first and only time I had been there. I cannot wait for this one to open up and start being delicious. It was meant to be as far as I’m concerned.

In other news I have been struggling somewhat with the writing for this week. At first it was due to the utter inability for my writing style to match with the writing style of my partner in crime. We have come to a solution to this. I’ll write it first then he’ll give notes and we’ll also get notes from a trusted source. And then we rewrite it. This sounds awesome and easy right?

The trick is that I have to get it written you see. It won’t work any other way. This is great because I can fall back on my writing style then again I have to get it done. Who knows maybe I’ll manage it with the pressure of someone bearing down on me. It could definitely help.

Well back to writing.

Later Days,

 Hey everyone my next installment of My Life as it Should have been is up and ready to read.


Check it out.  I hope you enjoy.
 Greetings. For those of you who do not know I Trelk am guest starring in several of ZeNatoto's Let's Play videos on YouTube. Here's a link to the first set.

Pt. 1

Pt 2

Pt 3

Pt 4

If you enjoy these videos let us know. Also stay tuned because we'll soon be uploading another set of Let's Play including me. We'll be playing The Great Circus Mystery starring Mickey and Minnie Mouse.

A tale of Horror and Tropes

Hey guys. I thought I would go ahead and show up with an update on my whereabouts which have finally changed drastically for the first time in quite a long while. I made a rather harrowing journey down further south than I already was.

It all started when I got a call from my friend Zanatoto with an offer to go down to Groveton for a week and earn a little pocket cash as well as work on actually getting a script we’re working on together finished and hopefully off the ground. I thought ‘a chance to hang out with my friend and further my career and make a little money? Naw. I have a lot of lounging about the house to accomplish.’ But he was insistent and thus I jumped into his car the moment he showed up, and we were off! Right after our ‘quick’ stopby Movie Trading Co. to see if we couldn’t pick out a few choice games of a questionable quality. We succeeded. He got 3 Ninjas Kick Back, some Mickey Mouse game about a circus, and Radical Rex. Radical Rex is a game where you play a fire breathing T-Rex who gets to skateboard every now and then.

Then I got a call. I was then reminded that I had in fact forgotten to give the keys to the Blue Goose back to my family. So we made a quick turn around to give the keys back. But then. Then we were off! Off on our journey to the south. To the wonders of Groveton. Right after we stopped for gas. But then, then we would be off. And so it was that we departed this place for one of a more promising time. We began to discuss at length all the things which would bring our characters to life in this movie. We spoke of backstory and how the Satanic Cult should be imaged after Jehovah’s Witnesses (apologies to Satanists everywhere.) and how exactly we could get a protagonist to be likable and at the same time providing a proper instruction video for pedosexuals everywhere. (After all we are hoping to use Amazon for distribution)

That’s when we realized that we had missed our exit. We were heading deeper into Dallas and possibly out of Dallas. But we were then trying to ascertain what references if any that we could/should make to anime in our film. So we called up a couple of our friends The Duelist and Caius. We figured we’d have to call them separately in order to talk to both of them but they were together seeing as they read our minds and were naturally eager to do our bidding. We were given countless different Anime tropes to use some of which we knew about and some of which we recognized after they were mentioned. And there were those that I still don’t understand.

But miraculously after having been lost for some time in the maze of Dallas Texas we made our way to southbound 45 and we were truly on our way this time. It all went smoothly. Like a glass of curdled milk. Zanatoto and I both smoke so we were able to smoke in his car the whole way down. I believed this to be a wonderful thing and I enjoyed this opportunity.

But not for long. It seemed as though every single time I went to put out my cigarette something went horribly awry with the seemingly simple prospect. In one case the cigarette (still burning mind you) got thrown by the wind all the way into the back seat. I was scrambling to find it before anything bad happened. And of course it had rolled to the very back. I used all of my concentration and effort to stretch far enough to reach it. I succeeded. I almost burned my fingers off. But I succeeded. Then there was the time when the cherry of the cigarette was knocked out and onto my neck. Thankfully after a quick yelp it was gone. Right into my seat. I managed to put it out by way of smashing it out with my cup. Genius! You surely must say. I tell you though that it was not. My cup was made of Styrofoam. I realized this after it was too late. Thankfully though it did not manage to burn all the way through.

Then as if my failures with the disposal of my cancer stick refuse were not enough we wound up next to a truck that was just staying right next to us. Normally this wouldn’t be a big deal but he was right about in the blindspot so Zanatoto sped up to alleviate this problem. The truck sped up and matched us. Things were now starting to look a little less like an unfortunate circumstance and more like a bad horror film. Mind you we are in the middle of East Texas now and we are surrounded by trees. There are precious few other vehicles about. That’s when we realized that one of them might not be too precious after all. Zanatoto went to slow down but there was another vehicle right behind us not letting us do so. And what little deceleration we did manage was matched by the truck. I do believe that banjos began to play inside my head. Thankfully Zanatoto managed to put on a massive burst of speed and get in front of the Truck before he could even consider matching it. Shortly there after both vehicles in question passed taking my banjo track with them.

That was not to be the end of our perils of the night though. Oh no. Our journey had just begun. Well alright fine it was almost over but seriously that does not fit with the proper foreboding that I wanted right there. The next peril though was more dire still. As we drove along we came upon a trailer. I say a trailer not in the sense of one you might find in a trailer park but rather one that you attach to your truck and fill with many assorted things that must absolutely all be moved at the same time. Now you say why would you not specify that you saw a truck with a trailer attached to it? The reason for that is simple. We couldn’t see it.

The trailer being dragged rather woefully behind it was so loaded down with boxes and assorted crap that it was impossible to see what it was that was pulling it. What we could see though was that it was weaving in and out of the lanes. I don’t get the feeling that it was in a good natured ‘I pay taxes on both sides of the road so I’ll use em as I please’ sort of weave. No this was definitively a ‘Not a drop ociffer’ kind of way. It took us many moments of debating and bracing ourselves before we could manage to pass him on what we determined to be his outbound weaves. Luckily Zanatoto plays a lot of plat forming games so we made it by unscathed.

Which reminds me. I will be guest starring on several of Zanatoto’s Let’s Play videos on YouTube. We’ve already filmed one and I will provide a link for it whenever it gets uploaded. But for now that is all. I’d like to give a great big thanks to all the people who contributed to our adventure. Caius, and The Duelist, but not the stalker trucks nor the cocktail trailer. Until next time, Later Days.
UPDATE:  The first installment in the series of ZeNatoto's Let's Play series has been uploaded. It's Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Check it out.  www.youtube.com/watch  Let's Play!

The Harrowing Tale of my Final Push

The month of November has ended. There have been a great deal of things said. Even more things that have been done. Most of all though many things have been written. I speak of course of NaNoWriMo.

Over the course of this last month I have known joy, sorrow, anger, disappointment, jubilation , and of course utter insanity. I began by ultimately writing very very little. At first I intended to write a Science Fiction/Romantic Comedy Alternate History/Erotic Free For All. This did not fare well. I was not in the mood to write something serious at all. It was quite simply not meant to be. It was not until the now dubbed Evening of Scribbling Recklessly that I was able to get any real writing done. I had just over 6k when we started and that was from the entirety up to that point of the month which I believe was almost halfway through.

Then during a word war that night I had a thought. This thought though it was simple and seemingly inconspicuous changed everything. In the middle of the word war I looked up and stated out loud ‘I should write a religion’. So I did. Right then and there I began to write a religion which did in turn transform into an entire story focused upon the people of this religion and how it is that they go about their lives which are fully dependent upon their God who does in fact exist.

Then an Atheist appeared out of the blue because they needed someone to not follow the path. Otherwise why would they have any problems. Then a young boy who had not yet come of age discovered lying. No one had ever lied up until now. From there on I was writing far more than I had previously but I was still pitifully far behind.

By the time that November 29th had rolled around I had a total of 27,691 words I believe. I needed 22,309 to make it to the 50k finish line. It was now that I was truly sensing despair. I felt that I could not possibly make it all that way in that amount of time. It was heart breaking. I had just begun to find my novel and really explore it but now there was no way that I would be able to finish it in time for the elusive purple bar.

That is when I decided to either put up or shut up. I was either going to throw in the towel right then and there or I would by God and Sonny Jesus make it past that 50k finish line. So upon the day of the 29th I wrote a total of 11,045 words. Almost half of what I needed. I would have written more but I had accidentally fallen asleep not once but twice. My resolve was there but my body had decided that it did not feel like showing up. Most of those words had been written during the afternoon right before midnight.

Because of this I did not have any sleep between the 29th and the 30th but rather I continued on throughout the night having no sleep to comfort me. It was alright though. I had my fellow NaNoers to comfort me and or threaten me whatever was necessary. I also had my soda and energy drinks. This caused me to be in a hyperactive state for much of this time. Then as the night wore on I realized with great sadness that my fellow NaNoWriMo Tweeps were all leaving me. Then there was only one left @vampiresmitten. She remained with me the longest that night. Partially due to her own word count needs and partially due to her inability to admit that Harry Potter is in fact Emo.

Then it reached 5am and she too left me. I was alone. I was hyper. The sleep I had gotten before the beginning of my great push towards my final goal had not been terribly good sleep and thus my mind had been somewhat weak even from the start. Now though that I was hyper active and had in fact brought myself over the 40k benchmark things had turned sour. If ever I needed a break there was no one to talk to. All I could do is go outside and smoke a cigarette. But my Nano never left me. It could not leave me. Nor could I leave it. I then began to suffer from an utter lack of attention. I always believed that more time had passed than actually had. I would feel that it been a long haul and that I needed a break and I would look at my word count and see that I had only managed perhaps 60 to 100 words. I became utterly convinced that my word processor was conspiring against me.

I decided that in order to prove this that I would need to conduct a word war to make me stay and write for a specific amount of time and then I could calculate precisely how many words per minute I was getting. So I went to Twitter and I didn’t even notice that no one was there. For that was when my challenger appeared. In the form of me. I had at this point begun to Tweet myself since no one else would listen. The Tweets are still out there as proof. But I had my challenger now. And we battled fiercely and we tied. I was somewhat disappointed that I had not managed to put myself in my place but at least he hadn’t either.

This experiment actually proved that my word processor had not in fact chosen to betray me. I still think that it was just a clever ploy and there was a leak involved but I had no proof to prosecute it with so I moved on. On through the trials of my long trek towards 50k. Soon I was in fact lamenting at the creation of my MC seeing as he was being Emo enough to give Harry Potter a run for his money and title. Sure some of it was warranted seeing as he had triggered events that lead to his expulsion from his home country and attempted murder but it was not entertaining. So in order to please him and simultaneously teach him a lesson. I did this by putting him and his love interest back together. That was the pleasing part. I managed to get his love interest out of the country to see him by having her flee with other refugees from an ideological cleansing that had been helped in no small way by his actions.

That was when I lost it and simply needed a direction in which to point myself until I got to 50k. So I explored the rest of the world until lo and behold at 11:18 AM I achieved the hallowed purple bar.

I was overjoyed and I jumped and skipped. I may have even frolicked a bit to my embarrassment. But I had done it. That is when I fell upon my bead and sailed into unconsciousness despite the energy drinks. It was during this sleep that I was haunted by a nightmare featuring the number 49,999. I was distraught but I quickly looked at my computer and knew everything was ok.

So now that all of this is over said and done. What is it that I want to do? I want to keep writing. I don’t want to wait to go back and edit everything. I want to get back in the thick of things and get it ready for proper consumption. Obviously my brain has been rewired by this experience.

The Great Raft proves to be problematic

 I’ve run into a problem. The religion I started out creating has started to stifle me under the requirements of what the world has. The Great Raft is the creator of the world. He’s good at creating but he’s no good at inventing. That’s why he created man. Man’s purpose is to invent things for the Great Raft to create. Man has been unable to create things for himself and thus relies on the Great Raft for everything. The trouble is how can I diversify the jobs in this world beyond The Village Elders (Who undertake the function of Priests) Higher Ups (who are the officers of Bureaucracy put down by The Great Raft to keep mankind from bothering him too much.) and Teachers (who teach everything not covered by The Village Elders).

I can’t think of exactly what the other jobs would be. Obviously they need people to operate the various creations of the Great Raft but I feel that their needs to be something more for them. They get food from factories that churn out already prepared food. The cafeteria workers just go into the kitchen and push a button or pull a lever and food is dispensed. There’s also separate stations where any one who wants food just goes up and does the same thing to get a properly portioned meal or snack depending on where they went.

But what other jobs could their be? Everyone invents things it’s a part of the church service. Any ideas on what they could do are welcome.
The Evening of Scribbling Recklessly was an inordinate amount of fun. More than that though is that it was remarkably productive and not just in the sense of my word count. (Which by the way I added 3021 words to during that time) I also met many a new person as well as actually getting to know many of the people I’d met earlier better than before (remembering many of their names this time.). Due to my nature of always talking to people and even more so due to my penchant to mentioning random things that have almost nothing to do with the conversation I managed to get a job lead for a security job. Not only that but I also got information on how I can go about getting a job as a copywriter for an ad agency.

It’s a job that I’ve always felt that I would be good at and although a degree certainly means something in the field from what I was told by the source of this information it is ultimately the work and the talent and skill that allows one to get the job. So I shall be looking to get a portfolio started for that.

Then after the whole thing had drawn to a close there was as usual a plethora of snacks that were unclaimed and needed someone to take them home. So I made off with the vast majority of the chex mix I had made (it was surprisingly unpopular) I also made off like a bandit with three different bags of chips (only one of which was opened) some bean dip, crackers, easy cheese, and two gallons of ice cream. So I get home still on a high from socialization and plenty of sugar and caffeine and what do I find?

I find a Facebook message from a friend with good news for my career (though not the kind of news that calls for immediate celebration) as well as a proposition that would allow me to hang out with him for the first time in a long while as well as make a bit of money to make my unemployment that much easier.

All of this on top of my improved word count and what amounts to me essentially discovering the true nature of my NaNoWriMo. I’m in a better mood than I’ve been in for a long time. It also doesn’t hurt that my mind is being blown because I’m seeing a show all about the Beatles Mania specifically in Russia.

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